I’m blogging for my pals over at the Lek, here’s a piece I posted this morning:

Howdy all, Schinders here.  Been back in the online dating pool a few weeks now, and I’m finally adjusting to the temperature.  I’m beginning to remember how this all works.  I’ve also seen, and remembered, some things that just seem inexplicable.  So, here they are, my top five things that make me go Hmm, the stuff you don’t know why anyone would do, my Top Five Online Dating Mysteries!

  1. A CONFUSING PHOTO – Why did you post that photo? You claim to be a non-smoker, yet in this picture you’re clearly smoking.  Or, I think that’s you in the picture, but it’s taken from so far away, who can tell?  Or, wow a picture of a group of guys… I wonder which one I’m communicating with… People, post a photo of you that looks like you, that’s clear, that’s attractive… this is common sense stuff folks…
  2. THE DISAPPEARING SUITOR – We’ve been writing emails, you’ve asked for my number, and…. that’s all she wrote.  It happens a lot, at least fifty percent of the time I’d say, that someone asks to contact you in person, and then doesn’t.  I don’t know if it’s nerves, or just a game of how many numbers can I get, but it happens often enough to make me question it.
  3. THE POUR SPELLER – Why would you post a profile with spelling and grammar errors? Just spell check, or ask a friend to look at it.  I don’t mean to be a dick, but people are judging you on this, put your best foot forward.
  4. THE PEST – There are people out there who don’t want to accept a nice rejection, and will keep pestering a person until they are finally blocked.  “Why won’t you go out with me?” “How do you know we’re not a match if we haven’t met,” or my favorite, the angry pest who instigates a conversation, and then when rejected lashes out, “Oh yeah, well you’re not so hot!”  If someone actually took the time to respond, even if it’s not the answer you wanted, be respectful.
  5. THE SILENT LURKER – This is the weirdest one to me, because supposedly we’re using these sites to actually meet someone, the person who looks at you every day, and I mean every day, but never contacts you.  Even if you find them attractive, and write to them first, they don’t respond… What is that???

There’s more I’m sure. What do you find frustrating or enigmatic about the process?

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